Prompt: #135 Guilty
Word count: 300
Summary: The guilt hits Ian every year.
Notes: Written for numb3rs100, part of A Silk Pillow ‘verse. This one and the next two are a small arch I put a lot of work and rewrites into. I'd like people’s thoughts.
Miscalculations and Memories (#135 Guilty)
Charlie looked at the things Ian had laid out. They were the worst he had. Things that couldn’t be used on the human body without causing damage. The first year it had just been a flogging and Charlie hadn’t known why.
“No Ian. Put them away.” Ian didn’t move. “I’m serious.”
Ian looked up at him. “Please.”
“No. This will not bring them back. This will not make you feel better. If you want to talk I’m willing but I am not doing this. Not tonight.”
“I need this.” Ian pleaded.
“No you don’t! If you want to wallow in guilt for being alive find a bar or a church. If you want a beating then you’ll have to find it somewhere else.” Ian rocked back. “I’m serious, either put those things away or take that off,” Charlie pointed to Ian’s collar “And get out.”
Ian rose up like a thunderhead and towered over Charlie. Charlie held his ground. Ian’s collar hit the floor. A minute later the front door slammed.
Charlie put his face in his hands. He’d finally done it. Miscalculated. Pushed too far and not given enough. He sat down hoping Ian wouldn’t go get himself killed.